Minerva.

'Onto me?' I croaked, and didn't that turn of phrase conjure up all sorts of intriguing thoughts?

'Yeah. Your whole push me/pull me routine is really textbook,' he drawled.

'You think that if you're mean, I'll just run true to type and tell you to fuck off. And then you can feel all validated and have no excuse to actually, y'know, interact and have human emotions because you're so sure that every other person in the world is a useless, uncaring bastard and you have proof.'

'I don't think that,' I began angrily. 'It's just that people are...'

'Shut up,' he said sweetly, kissing me slowly to take the bite out of his words.

'Even you can't keep up the bitch goddess act for ever, this afternoon being a case in point,' he murmured against my lips before pushing me gently into the car. 

-Let's Get Lost, Sarra Manning

Not quite me but another incarnation of.

Working on this, trust me.

*

The New never lasts.

I'm turning 17 in an hour but god, I feel old.

It's a dreary feeling but then I'm getting this inkling that 

somewhere along the line things are going to get better.

No, not even better.

I think it's going to be good.

*

One day, when I have a kid,

[let's say it's a girl so I won't have to keep

using both female and male pronouns]

I'd watch cartoons with her and colour with crayons

and let her paste the pictures all over

the fridge and walls.

We'd have a backyard, hopefully,

and a tyre swing.

I'd let her wear whatever she wants,

even the most ridiculous mismatched over-the-top outfits.

I'd randomly drive up to her school

and take her out from class for the day,

citing a family emergency,

and we'd go for ice-cream shakes and a movie.

I'd play her my Jimmy Eat World records

and tell her about being young and hopeless.

Hopefully she'd like the stuff I do,

but if not that's cool too.

I'd let her kiss boys or girls

or both, whichever one[s] she would prefer.

I would never ever hit her for whatever reason.

*

I want to be in love forever.

*

My parents are Buddhist,

as you may or may not know.

I was telling my mother of my belief

of The Flying Spaghetti Monster

but didn't get to elaborate on

wanting to be touched by His Noodley Appendage

because all I got were weird looks and

loud "What nonsense?"-s.